Hardpressed Read online

  She took a deep breath. “Listen, I understand this is your baby, Erica. You seem like someone who would be great to work with and learn from. The decision is yours of course, but I’d really love to be a part of this team.”

  She bore into me with her dark blue eyes, waiting to pounce on the next interview question, no doubt.

  “You’re fine with the pay?”

  “Absolutely.” She waved her hand definitively.

  I clicked my pen, stalling even though I’d already made the decision. “Fine.”

  “Fine?”

  “Let’s do this.”

  A huge smile spread across her face. “Really? Oh my God, you won’t regret it.”

  I stood, and when we shook hands, hers trembled slightly in my own. Wow, was she that nervous?

  “You can start on Monday. We’ll sort out the paperwork when you get in.”

  “Awesome, thank you so much.” The smile plastered all over her face wasn’t going anywhere, I could tell.

  * * *

  Alli stretched out on the blanket beside me while I tossed crumbs to the ducks in the pond. The public gardens were just a few blocks from my apartment, and on a beautiful warm day like today, the park was alive with families, tourists, and people like us. I’d cut out of work early to pick her up, and we decided some sunshine was the first item on the agenda for her long weekend visit with me.

  “I forgot how much I love summer here.” Her eyes were hazy and wistful, like her thoughts were here but also someplace else.

  “You miss Boston yet?”

  Alli propped up on her elbow. “I think I do. New York kind of sucks you into its vortex. Sometimes I have a hard time imagining my life outside the city, but I have to say, I am enjoying the change of scenery. I needed a break.”

  The past several weeks had been an adjustment for both of us. After three years of sharing a dorm to being two hundred miles away, our friendship had been strained. But deep down, I knew distance alone couldn’t shake what we had.

  “No doubt. Any news from Heath?”

  “He’s doing well.”

  “I thought maybe you’d go see him, you know, instead of me.” I was glad she hadn't, of course. After bringing her up to speed on everything that had happened between Blake and me and then having Mark show up seemingly out of nowhere, we’d both agreed that we needed face time.

  “Friends first, biatch.” She smiled and gave me a little poke.

  I retaliated by aiming a few breadcrumbs at her perfectly tousled soft brown locks falling down her back.

  “Do you think you’ll visit him in L.A.?”

  “No. He needs his time there, and frankly, I need time too. I finally got my own place, and the move has been strangely liberating. Every day I felt like I was waiting for him there. Now I’m finally starting my life in the city, without every moment revolving around him and us.”

  I nodded, knowing full well how important independence could be in a new relationship. Keeping Blake at arm’s length was a constant struggle when I wanted nothing more than to be enveloped in the safety and security of his hyper-controlled world. Blake’s world was safe, but it wasn’t always reality.

  “That makes sense. When does he get back from rehab?”

  “Another month or so. Not sure yet.”

  “What then? Are you going to pick up the pieces and try again?”

  “I think so. We haven’t made any commitments, but—” She lay back and stared up at the trees above us.

  “What is it?”

  “I just… I miss him. That's all.”

  I paused, not wanting to push her either way. She was struggling with their separation, but I still wasn't convinced Heath was good for her. Even if he was Blake’s little brother.

  “Sometimes all I can hear is people judging us.”

  I cringed a little, praying she hadn't read my expression or my mind.

  “Like, what the fuck am I doing wasting my time with someone like him? My friends, even you, think he’s trouble, and I admit it, he’s got problems. But I can’t give up on us. He deserves another chance.” She wiped away a tear before it had a chance to fall.

  I lay down next to her on the blanket and waited for her to collect herself. Finding out Heath had a drug problem had been a shock, but I couldn’t ignore the fact that they were hopelessly in love. I’d never seen Alli so blissed out, and Heath had taken her there. I hoped she could do the same for him, enough to lure him away from an addiction that could ruin their chance for happiness together.

  “Alli, I care about you, and I want you to be happy. If I come across as judgy, it’s because I’m worried about your well being, not because I question Heath’s value as a person. Trust me, I know full well that no one and no relationship is perfect. He’s got issues, but all hope is not lost, I’m sure.”

  She turned her head and gave me a weak smile. “Thanks.”

  “If he can get his shit together, you can still make this work. Just be smart about it. That’s all I want.”

  She laughed. “I’m trying. I’m not very smart when it comes to being in love, I guess.”

  “Maybe this break is good. Obviously he needs to work through some of his own issues, but also you both can have time to really think about your relationship without being so wrapped up in the intensity of it.”

  “You’re right. I’m already getting into a better mind-set, you know, the more time we spend apart.” She took a deep breath. “Anyway, enough about me and my problems. What about you and Blake? Is he still driving you crazy?”

  “You know it.”

  “In a good way or a bad way?”

  “Both, but we’re figuring it out.”

  She gave me a grin. “I think Blake has met his match with you, Erica.”

  “Oh?”

  “Yeah, I’m sure you don’t take any of his shit. Mr. Software Billionaire probably has no idea how to deal with you putting him in his place.”

  I laughed at the picture she drew of us. She might have been right. I couldn’t imagine many people challenging Blake the way I did. I did it for self-preservation though, not sport. Still, the tug of war drove us both crazy. Mostly good crazy.

  “He keeps me on my toes, and he could probably say the same about me. Never a dull moment, that’s for sure.” I smiled to myself and my heart did a little flip at the thought of him. Blake was full of challenges. I never knew what the hell to expect from him, but that was just another part of our relationship that I couldn't get enough of. The rush, the negotiating, and when the occasion called for it, the sweet surrender.

  “Okay, the look on your face is making me nauseous.”

  I laughed. “Sorry.”

  “Don't be. I'm just bitter and lonely. Anyway, stand your ground. I know you will, but those Landon men can be pretty damn persuasive.”

  She looked serious for a minute, then a smile curved her lips and we burst into a fit of laughter.

  * * *

  Walking into the office still took me aback sometimes. The space looked great with the subtle lighting and sleek workstations. Sid sat next to two of the newest team members. I leaned on the desk they huddled around. They paused and looked up.

  “What’s new, guys?”

  Chris was about a decade older than we were. This wasn't his first job at a start-up, so he brought some experience that most of us lacked. A heavyset guy, he had bright red hair that was overgrown and curled up at his shoulders. Based on the past week’s attire, he seemed to have an affinity for Hawaiian shirts.

  On the other end of the spectrum, we had hired James as our dedicated designer and front-end developer. He was a different brand. With a mop of nearly black wavy hair, tanned skin, and bright blue eyes, he was by far the most naturally outgoing of the entire crew. Well-built with a touch of bad boy about him thanks to some ink that peeked out from his button-downs, he wasn't hard to look at either.

  “Morning, Erica.” He flashed a smile that caught me off guard.

  I smiled back
, surprised at being greeted with such enthusiasm so early in the morning. Good hire, I thought.

  Sid blew out a breath, apparently not sharing James’s mid-morning peppiness. “We’re trying to figure out a plan for rolling out the upgrades we talked about, but it’s a little hard with this band of misfits trying to take us down twenty-four hours a day.”

  “Uh-oh.” I cringed a little, having no idea how to go about technically fixing this problem beyond harping on Blake to work his magic. He’d been frustratingly vague about his association with M89, but clearly, due to whatever he’d done to piss them off so royally, the hackers were not going to give up easily.

  “Anyway, we’re figuring it out. Don’t worry about it.” He scowled and focused on the monitor, stopping periodically to jot down some notes.

  “Can I help?”

  “Nope.”

  His answer was predictably curt. For the Sid I’d come to know, who was regularly grumpy due to his erratic sleep schedule, being met with challenges at ten in the morning was unacceptable. I rolled my eyes and caught James smirking.

  “Keep me posted.” I pushed off the desk and disappeared behind the Chinese curtain partitioning my office from the rest of the space. Due to the size of the room and the budget, I’d decided to forgo the privacy that a build out would afford, and in the end, I was grateful Blake had honored that wish with his secret remodel. I felt secluded enough to do my work in peace but still connected enough to tap into whatever Sid and his crew were up to. Plus, Risa would be joining us soon, and we’d likely have a lot more regular communicating to do. At least we spoke the same language.

  When their informal meeting ended, I Skyped Sid to come talk to me. He came in, his tall frame towering over me at my desk. He settled into a chair across from me.

  “What’s with the attitude, Sid? We’re on the same team here.”

  “I realize that, but I’m getting really sick of patching holes in a sinking boat.”

  “We’re sinking?”

  He sighed. “No. But constantly patching vulnerabilities and fixing shit they’re breaking while trying to roll out new development is becoming pretty fucking tedious, Erica.”

  I sat back, stunned. Sid rarely swore, so his nerves were frayed. When my nerves were frayed, I cried in the privacy of my room or channeled my anger into being obsessively productive. When Sid’s nerves were frayed, everyone suffered.

  “What do we do? I want to help. I just have no idea how, Sid.”

  “Talk to your boyfriend. Doesn’t he have all the answers?”

  “Most of the time he does, yeah. But he doesn’t have a magic pill for this. I’m at a loss.”

  Blake’s strategy thus far had been to simply make the site completely impenetrable. Because I’d refused to let his team of programmers take over the site, the responsibility fell squarely on Sid. Now Chris and James shared the burden.

  “On the ground-level, there are improvements I can make to the site. At some point, we’ll need to redevelop it anyway to accommodate large-scale growth. The only thing I can think of is to work on that instead of doing these upgrades. Then at least we’re working with a more solid foundation, since clearly we’re going to be under attack for the foreseeable future.”

  “Sid, you’re scaring me. Rebuild the site from the ground up? There has got to be another way. We’re coming up on a critical marketing push.”

  “I’m not here to tell you what you want to hear. I suggest you talk to Blake. Whatever he did to bring this on, he should know how to fix it because this isn’t what I signed on for.”

  Sid’s response punched me in the gut.

  “Okay, how about you get the guys squared away with their work for the day and you can take the day off. Come back refreshed, and hopefully I’ll have some answers tomorrow.”

  I tried to keep my voice steady even though I wanted to tell him to grow the fuck up. Work was full of challenges. I had taken on the brunt of the ownership responsibilities, leaving him with the task of focusing on only what interested him—the development. Yet he marched around like the entire world was plotting against him. True, a small faction was in fact plotting against us, but he was being a little dramatic.

  He huffed and left my pseudo-office. He mumbled some things to the guys and slumped back into his chair.

  I smiled. Deep down, Sid was just as obstinate about giving up as I was. We had that in common.

  CHAPTER THREE

  Alli brushed on some bronzer while we got ready in my bathroom. She let me borrow a tight leopard-print skirt that fit like a glove. She took the liberty of pairing it with a black off-the-shoulder top. I had a feeling Blake might be stripping this outfit off me with his teeth in a few hours. God, I wanted him to.

  After two days of dedicated girl time, Alli was venturing out to get dinner and drinks with some friends so Blake and I could catch up. My skin was crawling from missing him so much.

  We’d survived brief periods of separation before, but usually those were colored by me being totally pissed at him, which helped stave off the unbearable attraction I had toward him. All I felt toward Blake right now was epic longing, especially after the mind-bending sex we'd had in the office a few days ago.

  I loved spending time with Alli, and I was glad for the time away from our respective boys if it meant reviving the friendship that we’d spent the past three years building. Between the Landon brothers, we had plenty to work through. I’d brought her up to speed with everything that had happened, from Blake blowing up my business deal with Max, to the total mindfuck of having Mark show up out of nowhere.

  Heath came up in our conversations with a frequency that made me question how much she was really appreciating their time apart. Tonight she’d been quiet, though.

  “Everything okay?”

  She smiled too quickly. “Yeah, definitely.”

  I finished sprucing up, and when I walked out, Blake was lounging on the new living room set I’d purchased for the apartment. In a white collared shirt rolled up at the sleeves and dark blue jeans, he looked so fucking delectable that I thought seriously about straddling him right then and there.

  When our gazes locked, his jaw dropped a fraction. The feeling was mutual.

  “You ready?”

  I smiled. Alli joined us and interrupted my laser focus on Blake’s amazing body. He rose to greet her and brushed a quick kiss on her cheek.

  “You look great, Alli. It’s good to see you.”

  “Likewise.” Her smile was tight, seemingly strained by some emotion that was bubbling under the surface.

  I tried to read her body language. Was she nervous or embarrassed about seeing Blake after the Heath situation in New York?

  “So I guess we’re off,” I said quietly, trying to break the awkwardness that hopefully only I was picking up on.

  We said our goodbyes, and Blake ran his hand down my back and gave me a gentle push toward the door. The power and suggestion of his touch had my skin tingling, my nerves alert. I was suddenly cursing our dinner plans when I wanted nothing more than to drag him upstairs to his apartment and rock his world straight into the dawn.

  * * *

  We stepped out of the apartment and Blake led me upstairs, his fingers interlaced with mine.

  “Did you forget something?”

  Before he could answer, we walked through the doors of his apartment and the smells of a home-cooked meal filled the air. Blake had cooked without any help from me.

  “Whoa.” The kitchen was a mess, but by contrast the dining room table was neatly covered with several matching pottery serving dishes filled to the brim with pasta, salad, and bread. The room was dimly lit, the mood enhanced by flickering candles set throughout.

  “I thought we could stay in,” he murmured.

  “But I got all dressed up.” I leaned back into his embrace, letting his arms wrap around me.

  “I'm glad you did. You look amazing. We'll be lucky to make it through dinner.”

  I bit my lip an
d my appetite wavered. Blake was by far the most mouth-watering item on any menu, but I needed fuel if I was going to ravage him all night like I'd planned.

  “Everything looks great. I can't believe you did all this by yourself.”

  “I hope you like it.”

  We settled down at the table, and he poured us two glasses of wine as I helped myself to a plate of Blake's soon-to-be-famous spaghetti Bolognese, so he assured me. I took a bite and was pleasantly surprised. Spaghetti was hard to screw up, but with as little cooking experience as he had, I was prepared for the worst. A comfortable silence settled between us as we ate, but I was still thinking about Alli.

  “How are things going with Alli?” Blake asked, as if reading my thoughts.

  I bit into my garlic bread before answering. Alli was in a tough place right now, both lovesick and heartbroken by her turbulent relationship with Heath. I wasn't sure how much I should say.

  “I think she's just going through a lot right now. With Heath and the move.”

  “The move?”

  “She moved out of the condo.”

  “I hope she didn't do that on my account.” His gaze rose to meet mine.

  I shook my head, remembering Blake's once fervent insistence that I maintain some distance with Alli while she was involved with Heath. I had swiftly refused and ignored his wish, and thankfully that had been the end of the discussion. With everything I’d been going through at the time, the last thing I needed was to isolate myself from the few people I could go to for support.

  “No. I think she needs some space to figure things out while Heath is gone. I don't think she’s had a chance to be very independent since she moved to the city.” I hesitated with the last thought. I wanted to tread lightly. Blake and Heath had their issues, but they were still brothers. I didn't want to cause problems between Heath and Alli if he didn't know about the move yet.